Two Voiceovers, A and B;

 

A: So what did you want me to do exactly?

B: well, we'd like you to welcome the audience to the 2009 Sydney University Science Revue.

 

A: the what revue?

 

B: Science revue.

 

A: ... that sounds really boring.

 

B: No, it's not. Honest! It's a sketch show, like comedy, you know, put on by Scientists?

 

A: Right. So pick the group of people famed for having absolutely no sense of humour whatsoever, and give them their own sketch show.  

 

B: We just need you to introduce it.

 

A: Alright, so you want me to say something like "Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome..."

 

B: That's it.

 

A: "... to the 2009 UNSW-"

 

B: No, Sydney University.

 

A: What?

 

B: It's not UNSW, it's Sydney Uni. 

 

A: Oh, god, I can't stand those people! And they're scientists. What a wonderful way to spend an evening. So, "... Sydney University Science Revue." Is that it?

 

B: Well, you should probably ask people to turn off their mobile phones.

 

A: Really? Why? Because you don't want people laughing at other people's girly ringtones?

 

B: Well, yeah, but also because it can interrupt the show. And also because they can interfere with sound and lighting equipment.

 

A: Really? I did not know that. I should probably turn my phone off then, wouldn't want this mike turning on at the wrong moment.

 

B: No.

 

A: Anything else?

 

B: Well, make mention of the fact that the exits are up the back in case of emergency.

 

A: Emergency?

 

B: Like a fire or something.

 

A: Whoa. Is the show that bad?

 

B: No, of course not!

 

A: So, just a contingency plan in case it flops then. Excellent. That's all?

 

B: That's all. You good to go?

 

A: Yeah, no worries. Where do you turn this mike on?

 

B: There's a little button on the side, just there.

 

A: Okay, cool. Three, Two, One, and go.

 

 

NB: Lines should be delivered as ordinary speech.