The REAL Wiggles

A Voice Over, with the inflections of a children's narrator, does most of the talking.

VO: One evening, after a hard day of work, the Wiggles decided to go to their favourite place, Kings Cross.

Pimped out Big Red Car comes out onto stage, with a Doof-doof version of Big Red Car. The new YELLOW is driving, BLUE is sitting shot gun, RED is in the back with PURPLE who is passed out with one arm hanging outside the car hanging onto a bottle of booze. They are in Kings Cross and speak with thick Lebanese accents.

VO: They were cruising for chicks, when Murray noticed that Jeff was asleep.

RED: Hey wake the hell up Jeff!

VO: Said Murray.

PURPLE makes gurgly noises

VO: But Jeff wouldn't wake up.

BLUE: The idiot, he's gone and date raped himself again.

VO: Concluded Anthony.

YELLOW: Okay guys, it's eight thirty, we've had a good night, don't you think it's time to go home?

VO: Said the new pansy yellow guy, who no one seemed to know the name of.

RED: Shut up new guy, you're only here until Greg gets out of rehab.

VO: Said Murray, his rudeness fully justified. But at that moment, something caught the Wiggles attention.

BLUE: Oh-My-God! Check out the hoes! Yelling out of the car. Fruit salad, yummy, yummy!

                    RED: I'll stack your hot potatoes!
                    PURPLE: Hoes!!
VO: The Wiggles yelled out of the car to invisible, but present hoes. The new guy made a feeble attempt to fit in.

YELLOW: Trying to pluck up courage .....y-yeah! I'd like to do them Wags the Doggy style!

RED: Oh-My-God, you're such a sick bastard!

VO: Reprimanded Murray.

BLUE: Look, this is bullshit, let's go get some weed before I hurt this reject.

VO: Anthony suggested helpfully.

RED: Yeah, come on moron, make this car do the twist and get us out of here.

The car turns around and the Wiggles start to drive off the stage

VO: And with that, the Wiggles set off on another magical, mind-expanding adventure. 

                    PURPLE: POT!!!

Lights down